My Name is Sara and I Come from the U.S.A. and I speak....Speutalianish?

(Insert the usual apologies for not writing sooner here)

So let's be real, this language thing is a Struggle Bus.

I came here knowing close to zero of the Deutsch. I used Duolingo a bit, and flipped through a textbook, but I was not prepared to communicate with anyone unless I was saying "I eat bread. I drink water. I like chocolate.". I think I maybe almost didn't get my Visa (you have to know German for a visa here), because the woman had no idea what I was saying , so she just kept repeating the question over and over, which made me think I had understood wrong. But that's behind me, whew!

I tried to pick up the language as fast as I could, but when I would try to speaking with the kids I would start speaking Spanish when I didn't know the word in German. This helps no one- not only because I am supposed to help with their English but they also don't speak Spanish. For the most part I have stopped doing this, but every so often a word slips in when I am speaking too fast. Also I often just say pobrecito to my youngest.

I (Yes, three paragraphs starting with I. Clearly I'm not an English major.) should also mention the region I'm in has a really strong dialect. My host mom has said that she's had au pairs who come here already speaking German, but due to the dialect and accent they still had trouble understanding what people are saying. In this sense it was helpful to not know German beforehand, because I was somewhat of a blank slate when picking it up.

Let's fast forward three months. When I leave the area (whether it's to Hamburg, Berlin, or Switzerland), I have more trouble understanding people. This is mutual, as I'm sure that between my American/Swabian/toddler accent and grammar, I am not the easiest to understand either. Usually, if they can, people (sometimes in annoyance) switch to English to speak to me.

An interaction I had in Hamburg:
Me: Ein Milchkaffee bitte
Barista: Ein Filterkafee?
Me: Nein, ein Milchkafee.
Barista: Was?
Me: Ein Milchkaffee?
Barista: (really annoyed) What do you want? A filter coffee?
Me: Milchkaffee (poiting to menu board)
Barista: What?
Me: Yes, okay, a filter coffee.

People have given me mixed responses to the German abilities I have acquired. Sometimes they're impressed at what I have picked up in the time I've been here, and sometimes they tell me I need to learn German because I'm in Germany, or more blatantly that my German is simply not good (to be fair this was said to me by a kid, who maybe are not always the most tactful of creatures). So really, I have no idea how well I'm doing.

However, I have become frustrated with the people who tell me to learn German, or think my host mom shouldn't speak English with me.

I try to be understanding when someone says something like this, because I think this belief or type of statement comes from feelings of isolation or being left out of the conversation when they don't understand everything, rather than from maliciousness. The problem with trying to be understanding about it is that I really do empathize with the situation/feeling, but I assume I experience it much more often than the person and thus sometimes get annoyed and can't always help thinking "Actually, this is my life every day. I think you can handle just a minute of it."

On the one hand I know I signed up for a language barrier in coming to Germany. And I know the people who say things like this to me did not sign up for a language barrier in just coming to lunch/going out for the evening/etc, but on the other hand that is still no excuse to be rude or to make someone feel like lesser of a person because they have not mastered a language in three months. Actually, I can think of no excuse for doing this.

It's also just hurtful and frustrating when someone says this because I'm really picking up as much German as I can as fast as I can. It isn't that I'm not trying. Or that I have no desire to learn the language. In fact, I really resent the whole "You don't need to speak German/Italian/French/whatever language, everyone there speaks English!" notion I heard a lot of before I left for here.  This is not actually true. And it's disrespectful. Also why would you choose to live in a country with another language with the goal of experiencing a new culture and not bother to give the language a try?

It is just that becoming fluent in a new language is really hard. And I would like to see any one of these people who have said these things to me go to a foreign country with a foreign language in which they have no background and simply learn it. With no formal instruction. And largely from a toddler. And then, to not be relieved when someone speaks their native language to them. Because sometimes it is just nice to have a break from struggling to make yourself understood and to understand what is being said.

Lastly, I think the point of an Au Pair (or one of the points, really) is a cultural exchange- not just a one way street of absorption. Which means sometimes speaking German. And sometimes English. And sometimes minion babble. Which means it is totally fine if my host mom wants to practice her (already very good) English. And it is really no one's concern!

Finally though, I started my language class last week. Since I have been here for three months, it's pretty easy so far (We spent two days learning how to say our name, where we are from, and what we speak). Although now I am having the reverse of the trouble I had when I first got here, in that I've tried speaking Spanish to some people in my class, and it comes out German. So basically I don't know what I speak anymore.

Minion babble. That's what I speak. Bananas!

Basically, the language barrier is a daily ride on the Struggle Bus to Struggle Town where I eat Struggle Pudding. But, I know how to order ice cream and coffee to-go, which makes up about 90% of my interactions outside playing with the kids. So that's good!

What I Learned in School Today

1. Minion babble is the same in German and English. Which I guess makes sense as it is another language.

2. The German title for Despicable Me literally translates as "I am simply incorrigible"

3. "It's so fluffy I'm going to die!" in German translates as "It's so fluffy I'm going insane!"

4. Mike Wasowski is Mike Glotzkowski (Gluts-kah-ski) in German

5. Baking soda is hard to find, but check the American section of the grocery.

6. Nutella is wonderful on a fresh soft bretzel.

7. It can be cheaper to buy a BMW (I think this was the car brand mentioned to me, otherwise just insert another fancy German car company of your choice here) online from America and having it shipped, than to actually buy it in Germany. Even accounting for switching some things over(like the speedometer to km/h instead of mph). However, it won't come with any sort of warranty this way.

8. Even I can get tired of Despicable Me and minions.

9. Human statues/silver men are just as scary here as they are in America.

10. There are Dunkin Donuts here. A lot of Dunkin Donuts.

11. "Cookies" refers specifically to chocolate chip cookies, while "keks" (pronounced cakes) refers to any type of cookie.

12. "Eis" means ice cream, which can cause disappointment if you ask a child if they want ice after they hit their head.

13. Children (and sometimes adults) swear in English because it isn't as bad as swearing in German. This makes for interesting dinners.

14. In German, there are separate words to differentiate a human eating from an animal eating.

15. The concept of a food baby crosses language barriers. Next we will see if the concept of naming your food baby does.

16. According to my youngest at least, babies are delicious. (I SWEAR I NEVER SAID ANYTHING LIKE THIS AROUND HIM! In German, at least)

17. "Muesli" refers to all granola, cereal, and muesli type products.

18. Mimicking German you learned from a 2.5 year old just leads to confused stares.

19. Figuring out German sentence structure became a lot easier when I started copying the sentence structure my host family uses (mistakenly) in English.

20. Jam comes in all flavors. All. Flavors. Mango, strawberry, pineapple, cherry, ginger, plum, grape, blueberry, raspberry, lime, kiwi, apricot, peach, rhubarb, lemon, apple, and any (I do mean any) combination thereof.

21. Some things are just hard to explain, period. Whether it's the issues within the American educational system or the point of marshmallow fluff.

Hamburg: Sara Eats Blue Food and is Introduced to the Cruel World of Claw Machines

My Sunday in Hamburg started bright and early at 6am. My friend and I really wanted to go the Hamburg Fischmarkt, but it goes from 5am-9:30am, so we had to get an early start.

We decided to take a longer route there, so that we could ride the ferry in. The ferry we took was decorated as an advertisement for the Lion King, so you know, that was worth getting up early for in itself.

Awkward angle for a panorama

I know what you are thinking when I say that I went to a fischmarkt. "But Sara, you are a vegetarian (A world's most awkward award winning one, at that), why on earth would you get up at that ungodly hour to smell some fish?"

The Fishmarkt did have a lot of fish, yes. But there were fruit auctions where you could get large baskets of fruit (I am talking needing two people to carry it back kind of big) for ten euros. As well as pasta auctions. And live music. And bakery and coffee stalls (where I got a franzbröchten the size of my head). And little tents to buy trinkets. Despite our exhaustion, it was a lot of fun. 

Most importantly I found and purchased a blue cupcake.

I saw the little truck the first time we wandered around the market. The man asked if I wanted to take a picture, I am guessing I was staring at the blue cupcake and smiling a little too much. Buuuuut, I was embarrassed and said no thanks and kept going.

Then we passed it a second time. I wanted the blue cupcake SO BAD! My friend said that I could get one and save it for later (I like blue. I like sugar. But even I have limits- it was too early in the morning!). Again, he asked if I wanted one, so I asked what was in the blue one.

To be honest I don't remember. I was just so happy (the company's slogan is "It's a happy thing" for a reason). Something about raspberry. Or wildberry. I do remember that it was a vanilla cupcake and a surprise (or special) filling (this tasted like a blueberry muffin-in the best possible way). We chatted for a bit (it turns out he opened the first cupcake place in Germany), then I walked away with my happy little cupcake.

I was *real* excited to eat it. I wasn't sure how long I would be able to hold off. 

Let's go back to my previous post where I A. talked about choosing directions from a human instead of a smart phone and B. talked about not planning too much when I go to a place. 

Well, before going to Hamburg I told myself that it was a very long journey to plan zero things for, and I decided to give the whole going from A to B to C type of travelling and sightseeing a shot. I found a walking tour that goes around to different attractions in Hamburg and thought I would give it a try. What else was I going to do with my day, after all?

My friend told me how to get to the nearest subway station so that I could get to the center. As I was walking, I mostly forgot exactly which turns to take and how to get there. So, I looked up how to get to the city center (or rather, the exact meeting point of the Rathaus) from where I was. The transit app gave me different directions than my friend had, but I thought I would give them a try.

I am never trusting a smartphone again. Rather than sending me to the Hamburg Rathaus, it sent me to one (I think Rathaus just means town/city hall or something similar) a ways outside the city. Which I didn't realize until we passed a stop that I remembered was near a museum I was mildly interested in a bit outside the city.

Least to say, I missed the tour. But, this was also maybe for the better, and I instead walked to the lake where I consumed my MOST DELICIOUS CUPCAKE EVER. Seriously. It was so good. I have never liked a bought-cupcake so much. I should have bought two. Or five. Or ten.

After this I went on the ferry, and took in a loop so that I could look at the city. It was really beautiful, but I was also maybe falling asleep-the inside of the ferry was so warm and I was so tired!

I then decided that I should maybe consume something green. Not neon green. Vegetable green. Although Hamburg is a city, it was still a Sunday so my options were pretty limited outside the Starbucks and McDonald's realm (I was hungry, but not desperate). I did manage to find a sandwich with green things on it, and to drink an "iced" (I use "iced" because it was more just not-hot than actually cold) macchiato. 

After this I decided it was time for one last stop at the Sommerdom. I was exhasuted, and really just wanted to sleep. But, I am not one to turn down a ferris wheel, so I headed in that direction (after looking at a real life map. No more of this smartphone business!)

It was just as fantastic the second time around.After walking the full loop, I rode the ferris wheel, and got a
nutella filled doughnut.

Then I got it in my head that claw machines can't be that difficult. They are just hard for kids. And, after walking around the dom many times I had seen my fair share of claw machines. Many of which had minions in them. I kept thinking, how hard could it possibly be to just aim and push a button?

So, I decided to give it a go. And let me tell you, those things are awful! There was nothing wrong with my aim, but the claw always dropped my minion! I decided that maybe the minions were too heavy for the claw. I found a machine with smaller minions (albeit they were the minions with little outfits, and I am not about that life). Only to see that they came with a smaller claw. WHAT EVEN IS THIS. All. I. Wanted. Was. A. Minion!

And thus, I was introduced to the cruel world of claw machines.

Like this. But giant.

As a thank you to my hosts, I wanted to bring them doughnuts back from the dom (the kids are too little to go yet). I went back to one of the doughnut stalls where you could see them being made in front of you. While I was there, I saw these things that looked like giant doughnut holes with chocolate sprinkles. Obviously, I wanted one. I decided to save it for the ride back the next day though. I was completely sugared out.

Spoiler alert: It was not a giant doughnut hole. It was rum cake. Sara's naiveté and desire for chocolate get the best of her again!

The next day, I had a short bit of time in the city, which I spent with a chocolate franzbröchten by the lake. Not a bad end to the weekend!